I open the Bible. Chapter 23 of Ecclesiasticus, verses 1 to 4, presents itself.
It is a prayer I like. It is so easy for the mind to grow haughty and the heart to swell with pride! No. Death rather than this. For this would mean to lose You, Lord, and I don’t want to lose You. Use whips and scourges, but keep your “violet” on the ground.
At twelve I say to Jesus, “Yes, Lord, lead me by the hand (I was reading a sentence dictated to Sister Benigna749 by Jesus which was my thought for the day). I want what You want, and nothing else. But I am afraid of the world....”
Jesus replies to me - He, who knows what kind of fear I am talking about:
“If they should impose silence on you in not recognizing that by my name and will you do what you are doing, answer as Peter and John replied to the Sinedrium after the healing of the lame man: ‘Judge for yourselves whether it is right before God to obey you rather than God. We [I] cannot fail to speak about what we [I] have seen and heard.’750 Besides, you could not keep Me from coming to you and forcing you to see and hear. And it would be foolishness in you to listen to the world, that wants to impose silence on God, rather than God, who wants to give light to the world. If I will, who can go against Me?”751
749 The Servant of God Benigna Consolata Ferrero (1885-1916), a Sister of the Visitation in Como.
750 Acts 4:18-20.
751 We omit the episode, written on October 17, involving “Judas Thaddeus’ Visit to Bethsaida to Invite Jesus to the Wedding in Cana,” found in the cycle on The First Year of the Public Life.